Tuesday, 25 March 2008

My date with...

So Jessica Alba called and asked me out. Apparently, those who left the messages on the tag board was not her. So yeah, it was 2AM in the morning. We talked for hours, inda kami betidur. But it was siang already. We even pulled the cliche goodbye - YOU hang up, no YOU hang up, no YOU hang up. I'm like apakan si Jessica ani. So I just hung up, sekali menyamal ia I hung up on her. We spent another few hours on the phone just so that I could pujuk ia.

She just happened to be in London, so I came down. Apparently she had some shooting katanya. She didn't want to talk about work, so aku layan lah. I didn't want to destroy her mood. I was so surprised she could speak some malay. She said she learned malay for her movie 'Sleeping Dictionary' where she played an Iban woman.

It was sweet of her to pick me up at the train station. I was a bit annoyed at people taking her pictures. She was sweet though, she did layan some of her fans but her attention was mostly arah ku. Aku smitten berabis. Tapi it was a bit annoying jua in the end when people were crowding her, so I suggested that she should disguise a little bit. Aku bawa ia ke tie rack untuk bali tudung tie rack yang 5.99. Lawa ia pakai tudung yoh! Macam orang Brunei usulnya. Kan mati saja ku inda meliat ia! So by then, no one recognised it was her. Happy berabis ku yoh, I tell you.

We headed to this restaurant, inda ku tau what it's called. It was her favourite restaurant. The place was quite deserted. I had an amazing dinner; great food, great company. She has this cute little laugh where every time she does it I swear aku kan pengsan. She's funny too. She makes me laugh. Aii, mati smitten ku yoh!

After dinner, we walked to her hotel. Kami cerita-cerita. She told me she just started reading my blog a few months ago. She was telling me she found it annoying how I always whine about my weight. Okay, okay, for her, I'll stop. I told her aku suka ia dari ku damit sudah. Dari since aku dalam parut mamaku sudah ku suka ia, banar. She was like, oh Jirin, we are so meant to be. Aku cakap ia cheesy sekali ia menyamal. But sanang wah aku pujuk ia, aku kelitik ia sedikit, okay tia. Oh, is this love?

Aku malas cerita what happened next. Inda kuasa membangga-banggakan barang cematu atu =p After all, I do not usually blog about anything too personal. But this is an exception. Jessica Alba kali ah. Not every Bruneian could say 'oh I dated Jessica Alba once'.

But later in the night, we both agreed it was just going to be a one-time thing. It was really emotional though. We lead separate lives and have non-intersecting circles. It's just impossible for us to stay together. Plus, if I do stay with her, si Rebecca Romijn kan ku apa? We're in good terms though. Also, I found out she was pregnant rupanya after her fiancé left me a message on my tag board telling me to back off. To Jessica's fiancé: eff off. The baby could've been mine too, bastard. Anytime soon, you will start to wonder why your baby is looking a little Asian, and that's when I go - 'HAHA!'

The date may not sound as romantic, but hey, I WENT ON A DATE WITH JESSICA ALBA. I don't want to post pictures of us together (believe me, we did take videos pictures!) because any moment now you can probably find them at those celebrity gossip websites. Aku inda suka wah kambang-kambang ani =p

(Haha, that was lame.)


Anonymous said...

u found out shes pregnant 'rupanya'? dude u went on a date with her and didnt notice? shes due to give birth sometime in the summer, buncit kali sudah ah parutnya ah =p

jirin said...

that's how smitten I was. Parut buncit pun oblivious.. I told you! Mata pun rabun tarus wah sama Jessica Alba ah.

Anonymous said...

Banar tu Jirs~...mun sudah cinta ani bau kantut pun jadi harum yo! hahahahaha! Ani kan tah lagi parut buncit! Btw, aku pun baru balik berdating dengan si Justin...he has this show going on and dropped by with his private jet just to pick me up....ain't he sweet? *flaps eyelid* hahahahhahhahahahahaha! I wish!!! Laps you Jirs ;)

-Mamalobeng's Pren

Anonymous said...

I find you interesting...witty, adventerous...and you look good just the way ure.

; ) Jessica

Liza said...

Hahaha..I was like "eh banar kah ni?" at first.

Kuat menyamal jua ah jessica alba atu.:P

Jirin said...

Mamalobeng's Pren,
awu mun sudah kinta, nda lagi ingau barang lain. aaah ada si jessica mention ia seflight sama si justin.. ktnya si justin pun ada date sama org brunei.. IT's a small world!!!

It doesn't matter what you think of me. You're with that stupid cash warren dude.

Apa pulang inda banar?? Banar kali ah. Awu kuat menyamal si Jessica Alba!! tapi manja at the same time hehe!

Mamalobengs said...

Hahahha!! ANTAM!!.. lain jangan tah gtau urnag tani dating sama celebrity bah.. dangkita h urang karang..

Kediaku sama c-Wentworth, Tom Welling, Matt Damon, Gerard Butler eh ramai lagi, nda ku ingar.. takut ku karang ramai tah urang minta autograph ku.. hahah.. awuttt!!

Btw, nya c-Jessica tudong tie rack atu nda lawa, macam semua urang brunei tedapat.. :P

Mamalobengs said...

I meant to say LAI not lain.. kan typo ku ani..

and bukan dangkita h, its actually dangki tah urang karang!


miss you lai!

Jirin said...

hi ka naj.

nada deh. ia saja tu merista arah kita yang tudung tie-rack inda lawa. yang aku pilih kan atu tepakai jua ia. hahahahah.