Saturday, 20 October 2007

Where got Apam

I was at Tesco the other day and I didn't know what to buy, so I just walked around the store; from isle to isle; at the same time wanting to discover something that will make me go "Eh murah jua?!" or "Ada disini wah?!" So anyway, in the end, I saw something that rather looks like Kueh Apam. This is the United Kingdom, of course, upon seeing that, I was rather shocked at the idea of orang puteh pandai membuat Kueh Apam. So aku bali. As soon as I left Tesco, I opened the package, took one and tried it.

I beg to differ.

It is so far from Kueh Apam. Inda lagi nyaman tu. It is so inda nyaman that it almost tasted non-food. Seriously, I'd rather have that cheap chocolate candy which comes in the Tora toy box. You realise I am exaggerating here right? Okay, okay, inda pulang inda nyaman cematu but I was really disappointed. But I was stupid enough to actually think that it would actually taste like Apam. Stupid. This is the United Kingdom! Finding Kueh Apam here would be like finding lauk masin di Oxford Street. Lain kali pikir dulu. Siasat. Jangan tarus-tarus ani.

I didn't want to throw it out because that would mean throwing se-paun ke dalam sampah. Se-paun equals tiga ringgit wah tu. So I decided to feed the ducks at the lake near my house. God knows kalau those ducks masih hidup atau inda bagas makan Kueh Apam palsu atu. Haha.

Hey, here's a reminder: do not overcharge your rechargeable batteries. If you think that the longer you charge your batteries, the longer it'll last, you are wrong. Haha, so anyway, I did overcharge my batteries. I left it charging for 4 effin days. On the day that I took it off, I put them in my pocket. This pocket of mine at that time was filled with 1 pence/2 pence coins. It was the back pocket to my pants.

Sekalinya, I went into a bus, paid the tickets and sat down. After a few minutes, I started to realise that my right ass cheek ani macam warm sedikit. Eh bisai jua tampat duduk ku ani. Suam rasanya. Then after that, macam panas berabis tia. It was so hot, it was burning my ass. It felt like I was sitting on a stove. It was that hot. So I stood up, removed the coins and batteries that were in my pocket. I held the batteries and the coins in my hands; only now I realised that it was the batteries. Tapi yang buduhnya ku tahan lagi tu dalam tangan ku. So now, I have coin burn marks on the palm of my hands. The coin burn marks on my palm; I swear kalau ku liat banar-banar ada muka Queen punya burn mark.

I would post a picture of my palm but then ketara tia yang sebenarnya apa yang ku cakap ani luan labihnya. Inda kan sampai ada muka Queen kan? Eksen ku sebenarnya tu. Banar pulang ada burn marks tapi nada kan sampai muka Queen pun ter-stamp. Hehe.

My ass was hot. My ass was burning. It was smoking. Do you realise that this is the only time that I get to say that to mean it literally? My ass is hot.

Apparently it was the overcharged batteries making contact with the coins. Barat lagi badanku ani, so when aku duduki the contents of my pockets atu, lagi tia kuat impact nya. Anyway, do not overcharge your batteries. Membari rusak. Mun rusak, nada taukeh kadai kan membari yang baru.

Beranti ku. Later.

4 comments:

D said...

Ahahahahahahaha... youre too hilarious!

War186 said...

Mati eh inda lagi te-comment apa yang cali bah. Everything that comes out of your mouth, eh salah, whatever you type out cali wah! Inda payah ku cakap keep it up kan? Man, Jirin you rock! ;)

Jirin said...

D & War,
thanks for dropping by! =)

Madamoiselle ver.2 said...

wahahaha!! ur ass is hot!! Good one .hahahaha...